I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize
