I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
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