omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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