I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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