I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
