batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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