i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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