She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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