the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
So many bounce houses so little time
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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