I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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