He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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