Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
