i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
