honey bunches of taint.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize
