My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
