I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize
