Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
