what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize