I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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