i would punch a child for taco bell
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
