then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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