So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
