I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I want a musical about memes.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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