she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
