Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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