You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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