out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
