I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I wish you could order shots online.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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