Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
