Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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