he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
