You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
