Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
