dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I intend to get homeless drunk
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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