it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
