Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
