Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
