I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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