I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
