I love black thongs
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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