Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
ugly people sure do ruin things
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
