after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize