So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
