You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
