I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
