Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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