If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
