i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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