dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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