Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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